Premarital Counseling

PREMARITAL COUNSELING A MINI-THESIS SUBMITTED IN PARTIAL FULLFILLMENT IN M.A. (BIBLICAL COUNSELING) . By Mahaveer Janapala mahaveerjanapala@yahoo.co.in Faculty D. Rajendra Paul, MTh. March 2007 ‘CARE’ COUNSELING INSTITUTE (Affiliated to TOPIC (Trainers of Pastors International Coalition) P O Box 965, Elkhorn, NE 68022 USA, www.topic.us ) ccareindia@yahoo.co.in H. No. 9-2-754, St. Francis St. Secunderabad – 500 025, India. CONTENTS 1. Introduction 2. Sexual Anorexia 3. Marriage Exposit
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   PREMARITAL COUNSELING A MINI-THESIS SUBMITTED IN PARTIAL FULLFILLMENT IN M.A. (BIBLICAL COUNSELING)  . By  Mahaveer Janapala mahaveerjanapala@yahoo.co.in  Faculty  D. Rajendra Paul, MTh.   March 2007  ‘CARE’ COUNSELING INSTITUTE (Affiliated to TOPIC (Trainers of Pastors International Coalition)P O Box 965, Elkhorn, NE 68022 USA, www.topic.us) ccareindia@yahoo.co.in H. No. 9-2-754, St. Francis St.Secunderabad – 500 025, India.      CONTENTS 1.   Introduction 32.   Sexual Anorexia 43.   Marriage Exposition 144.    The Family and The Church 175.   Divorce and Remarriage 276.   Social Perspective 357.   Choosing A Mate 388.   Affirmations and Conclusions 48Bibliography 51  1. INTRODUCTION Marriage is a sworn fidelity, a solemn covenant between a manand a woman, entered into before God, whereby He joins them in a life-long companionship of love for and commitment to each other.While God intends the marriage covenant should never be broken, it isbroken by the death of either partner, or in the case of adultery or such willful desertion as can no way be remedied by the Church or civilmagistrates. Such marital unfaithfulness is the grounds for a biblicaldivorce.God’s call is to love and to forgive. Divorce is not necessitated in any eventand Sessions should exhort couples considering such a step to activelypursue reconciliation.Divorce under any circumstances should not preclude continued attemptsto reconcile. Those who remarry after an improper divorce commit adulteryand are subject to church discipline. As with all other transgressions,these too are covered by the blood of Christ and members maybe restored to fellowship when guilt is acknowledged and true repentancefor sin is expressed.Church Sessions and Presbyteries must exercise diligent care inconsidering divorced persons as candidates for church office. 1 1. Position Paper on Divorce and Remarriage, Adopted 16 th General Assembly, June1996, Evangelical Presbyterian Church, America. 3/51  2. SEXUAL ANOREXIA According to Patrick Carnes,Sexual anorexia is an obsessive state in which the physical, mental, andemotional task of avoiding sex dominates one’s life. Like self-starvation with food or compulsive dieting or hoarding with money, deprivation withsex can make one feel powerful and defended against all hurts. Thepreoccupation with the avoidance of sex can seem to obliterate one’s lifeproblems as with any other altered state of consciousness, such as thosebrought on by chemical use, compulsive gambling or eating, or any otheraddiction process. The obsession can then become a way to cope with allstress and all life difficulties. Yet, as with other addictions andcompulsions, the costs are great. In this case, sex becomes a furtiveenemy to be continually kept at bay, even at the price of annihilating apart of oneself. Why someone fails sexually? Carnes states under the subtitle of “Sex as Sleaze,” thatReligious traditions have, in fact, been part of this split way of understandingsexuality. The ideas of sex as sin outside of the marriage and sex as duty insidethe marriage have gone far to undermine the acceptance of sexual pleasure asnormal or healthy.Biblically however, we realize that the “frigidity” of “religion” has nothing to do with failing sexually. It is clear that God’s design for sexuality is quite healthyand normal within the confines of marriage. For instance, in the Old Testament God gave direction for healthy and normal sexuality in the book of Leviticus. Reviewing the Song of Solomon, one comes very close to blushing with the beauty and romance suggested by this highly erotic and biblical text! 4/51


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