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To Survive or Thrive?

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Have you ever wondered why humanity lives in a perpetual state of survival, and why it is so difficult to get ahead and thrive? Why is it that certain people are placed as authorities over us, and that we need their permission to enjoy life? Why do we over consume? Why are we so competitive? If so, you may benefit from reading on...
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  To Survive or Thrive?  by Nathan & Aline Haveyoueverwonderedwhyhumanitylivesinaperpetualstateofsurvival,andwhyitis sodifficulttogetaheadandthrive?Whyisitthatcertainpeopleareplacedasauthorities overus,andthatweneedtheirpermissiontoenjoylife?Whydoweoverconsume?Why  are we so competitive? If so, you may benefit from reading on… Theonlythingthatmakesusseeanotherpersonasanauthorityoverusisourneediness forthatwhichwebelievetheyhaveandwelack,andthisneedinesscausesseparation  betweenusandthem.Insteadofbeingindesire,whichisaplaceofthriving, interdependence,andcreativity,indualityweareinneedforoursurvival,whichis translateddownintohowwedefinelove,affection,attention,money,sex,intimacy,and more.Humanitywastrickedoutofhavingsuchthingsandintoneedingthembyabrilliant sleightofhand,weshiftedourfocusfromdesiringthebeing,purpose,orrelationship,to perceivingthefruitofsuchrelationshipsasbeingtheconnectorthatunitesbeingsand energiestogetherin relationship,andthen focussingonitinstead. Thingssuchassexormoney  shouldbetheresultofthe relationship,andnotthe intimategluethatbindsit together. Forexample,ifIamalready  connectedtomywifeandI takemydesireoffofherand placeitontothefruitofour relationshipinstead,suchas sex,Ibecomeneedyforsex andhavethuscaused separationbetweenthetwoof  us.Inthisway,welosethe amazingsexwehadandare nowsubjecttothegameof  dominanceandsubmission,asmywifenowbecomestheauthorityandholdscontrolover mysexuality —allbecauseItookmyeyesoffofherandplacedthemontothefruitofour  relationshipinstead.Sinceshe(theexternalrepresentationofmyfeminine)nowholdsthe  DivinePollination.com  keystomysexuality,Iwillperpetuallyseekherpermissiontoenjoysex,whichshemay  thenresist,evenifshegrudginglygivesintomyneeds.Womenmayalsoembracetherole ofsexualgatekeeper,andactaseitherahealer,prostitute,orseductress,toeitherbenefit others or leverage their position for selfish gain.  Whenmywifetakeshereyesoffofmeandinsteadplacesthemonherneedformeto understandheremotionalneedforsecurity,andIbecomethegatekeepertothoseneeds  beingmet,andImayalsoresisther,becauseitisasuffocatingresponsibilityformeto  bear.Menmayalsoembracetheroleofemotionalgatekeeper,actingaseitherahealer, hero,ortyrant,toeitherbenefitothersorleveragetheirpositionforselfishgain.Inthis scenario,shewilleitherneedtofindanotherwomantogossipandconfidein,oranother sexualpartnerthatshecangainemotionalsupportfrom,tobeabletofeelfullenoughto continueon.Thisisaneverendingcycleofleaningonotherstofillthelackandneediness that this errant belief system has caused. Becauseawomanisseenasthegatekeeperandauthorityaroundsex,whenawomanis  viewedbyaman,sheismeasuredforhercapacitytoprovidesexualpleasurein comparisontoothergatekeepers.Herworthisnotvaluedforthefullnessofwhosheis,  butjustforhersexualcapacityandabilitytosatisfyhisneeds.Thisalsoexplainswhy   womenaresoreplaceableandinterchangeabletomen,andwhyamancanbesoeasily  replacedbyanotherwhoisabletoprovidegreaterfinancialsecuritytoawoman.From thiswecanseethatthepatriarchalsystemisactuallyonewherethefeminineisthesexual authority, and the masculine is the emotional and financial authority. Thispatternrepeatsitselfinotherrelationshipsaswell,forinthecaseofmoney,ithas  becometheneededcomponentformetolivemylife’spurpose,butallthatisactually  neededisformetolivemypassionandfocusontherelationshipbetweenme,mybusiness, andthepublicthatIamserving.Thisswitchfromfocusingonmylifepurposeand passionstowantingaparticularfinancialoutcome,istheswitchfromdesiretoneed,which thenputsmeinaspaceofneedingtofindanauthority(gatekeeper)togivemepermission tohavemoney,suchasaboss,clients,etc.However,Icanactalsoastheauthoritywithmy  clients,employees,andconstituents,knowingthattheymustcometometohavetheir needsmet,butforaprice—givemeyourmoneyandIwillgrantyourneedswithmy   products or services, I make myself the gatekeeper to your perceived happiness. Thispatternalsorelatestothemasculinefreedomwoundandthefeminine’ssafetywound, asmenwantthefreedomtomeettheirsexualneediness,whichismuchmorethantheir  wivesorgirlfriendscanpossiblysupplytothem,andtheyalsowantfreedomfromtheir feminine’semotionalneediness,whichalsofeelsoverwhelming.Whilewomenwantthe  DivinePollination.com  securitythattheirmenwillprovidefortheiremotionalandphysicalneeds(experiencedas romance),andtofeelsafefromthepainthattheirmeninflictonthemwhentheyrunoffin theirpursuitofsexualandemotionalfreedom.Thefreedomwoundispleasureoriented, needingthefreedomtofindtheirperceivedlackofpleasure,whilethesecuritywoundis painoriented,havinganattachmenttobothfeelingandavoidingpain,forfeelingthepain canbeusedtobeseenbytheirman,andavoidingpaincanbethereasontogettheirman tostoptheirselfishpursuitofpleasure.Pleasureandpainaretwosidesofthesamecoin however, they are the duality split of having a joyful experience and state of being. Dependenceisthemodusoperandioftheseparationandneedinesssystem,andthosethat mightappeartobeindependentreallyarenot,astheyarejustworkingaroundtheir dependencethroughrejectingneedypeople,orthroughbecomingadrugdealerofthe  variousneeds.Needypeoplegooutofthewaytosupplytheneedsofindependentpeople  becausetheybelievethattheyholdthesecrettosatisfyingtheirneeds,buttheyalsogive awaytheirpowerbecauseoftherejectiontheyreceivefromtheindependentones.A  dependentperson’sneedforapprovalandtoavoidrejectionispowerful;rejectionisthe easiestwaytohustlesomebodyoutoftheirenergy,money,emotionalsupport,sex,or more.Independentpeopleareperceivedastheauthoritiesinlife,anddependentpeople arethosethatmustbeobedienttotheauthoritiesinordertoevenhavethehopeofhaving some of their needs met.  Adependentpersoncanbecomeanauthorityfigurethroughdominatingotherperceived authorities,thusturningthetablesinthesituation,andtherearemanyformsof  domination,fromrape,manipulation,aggressiveness,assertiveness,andevenpassivity.A  revolutioniswhenagroupofpeopleuniteintheirneedinesstooverthrowtheperceived sourceoftheirlack,butalltheyaredoingisascendingthethroneofdominationtobecome anauthority,creatinganewsetofhavesandhavenots.Onanindividuallevel,whena manrapesawoman,heisstealingfrom,andusingviolencetodominateaperceived authorityfigure,becauseheistiredofbeingresistedandrejectedbyher,forheperceives that she has what he needs; this is sad but true. However,interdependenceiswhenapersonisnotneedy,becausetheyarenotfocusingor attachedtotheresultsofarelationship,butareinsteadconnectedtoabeingorpurpose thattheydesiretobewith.Whenthishappens,theywillautomaticallyexperiencehaving theirneedsmetbytherelationship,andinwaysthattheycouldn'thavedreamedpossible, astherelationshipsuppliesallofthelove,affection,attention,money,sex,intimacy,and more, than an individual could ever want or need. DivinePollination.com   Withoutthislimitingperceptionloopgoingon,competitionisimpossible,becausepeople arefightingoverthefruits,whichisseenasthepermissionsliptogaintherelationship, insteadofhavingtherelationshipwhichcausesthefruitstogrow —thecarthasbeenplaced   beforethehorse.Thispatternalsoperpetuatesthebeliefinlimitedresources,asitsees scarcitywherenolackactuallyexists,forpeoplearelookinginthewrongplacefortheir abundance;theyarelookingatthefruitsinsteadoftheirrelationships.Consumerismand overconsumptionisanadditionalconsequenceofgivingawaypersonalpowerinthis manner,forpeopleareafraidofmissingoutonwhatshouldbetheirbirthright,which triggersapanickedhoardingandconsumingofsexualandfinancialresources;lustand greed. Theoveremphasisbeingplacedonsex,money,power,romance,fame,dominance, submission,authority,survival,war,lackofresources,poverty,starvation,fear, divisiveness,andmoreisreinforcedthroughthegovernments,schools,TV,music,movies, commercials,videogames,mediaoutlets,andtherestoftheentertainmentindustry,is donetokeepthegeneralpubliclookinginthewrongplacesfortheirabundanceand satisfaction.Thissteeringofhumanitytofocusonthefruitsofrelationshipsratherthanon thesanctityofrelationshiphasbeenahighlysuccessfulcampaigntokeepusfromourtrue creativity and personal power. Emotionalattachmentisthehealthyabilitytoconnecttootherbeingswithina relationship,whichissomethingweenhancewhenweletgoofourattachmentto particularoutcomes,suchasmoneyorsex.Fruitfulresultscomenaturallywhenwehave thecapacitytoemotionallyattach,butareblockedbyanyattachmentsthatwemayhaveto expectationsandoutcomes.Tobreakfreefromthiscyclewemustdisconnectfromour attachmentstothatwhichwethinkweneed,anddietotheexpectationthatwewillever receivethemagain,andinthisway,wecanshiftourfocusbacktothatwhichtrulymatters, ourrelationships.IntheDivinePollinationHive,weusetheEmotionalFreedom Techniques(EFT),alsoknownastapping,toalterourlimitingpatterns,integrateour shadows,andletgoofunhealthyattachments;ithasproventobeaninvaluabletoolonour path back to unity. Ourneedinessandseparationaretheaftereffectsoffocussingontheresultsofa relationshipratherthanontherelationshipitself,itisattemptingtomakethefruitsof   beingconnectedtheconnectorbetweenthoseinarelationship.Conversely,whena relationship,andthosewithinit,aretheprimaryfocus,allneedsdissolve,lack’sarefilled, andindividualsthrive,fortherelationshipprovidesmorethanenoughfruitsforthemto taste together; and in this state of being and doing, the two are again united as the One. DivinePollination.com
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